Need for Attention – 7 Healthy Ways to Gain Attention!

“I’ve never seen a smiling face that was not beautiful.” ~Author Unknown

We use the power of attention everyday as it is a need to hold everything together in the way we like it to be. All that we pay attention to stays solid in our lives. For example the recession, the more attention we pay towards it  the more we will hear and know about it. The more we focus on our careers the more successful we are. Maintaining our houses or our cars are also forms of attention.  Once we decide to let something go it will start to fall apart or disappear from our lives. For instance a house that has been left alone will soon turn into a ruin. A business that isn’t cared for will lose customers. A garden that hasn’t got any attention will soon be overgrown. People we no longer pay attention to will disappear from our lives. And we probably find even more of similar examples.

But attention doesn’t only apply to affairs or material things, it too applies to ourselves. It is indeed one of the most important needs!

The first thing in our life we truly need is attention as we are unable to live without any help as infants. In early childhood we try different ways to keep getting attention from parents, siblings, kids, and adults. We also start absorbing strategies from others. By the time we are adults ourselves, we have become the masters of our own tactics to gain attention. All that happens on a subconscious level though and even today most of the time we are unaware of following these behavioural patterns.

Often our strategies to gain attention is hard work. So we have to put in a great deal of effort to get what I call a glimpse of happiness or simply some attention. This is because our strategies are often not true to who we are. So while we have a true need of attention there is also a true way of getting it.

Here are my most powerful and almost effortless ways to meet our need of attention:

1. Look out for beauty! That is the quickest way to gain attention. Whenever you feel low in energy look out for beauty. Beauty is everywhere, but we usually don’t see it when we aren’t feeling well. In changing our perspectives from seeing only the negatives into seeing the positives we automatically become energised as the acknowledgement of beauty reflects also our inner beauty. Once we pay attention to beauty we meet the need for attention within ourselves.
2. Empower others! Smile at other people, show true interest in them. Look for the good aspects in other people and praise their strength. This will help them, but mostly it helps you meeting your need for attention. Once you empower other people, they will give you attention naturally. It is like a garden you maintain in a loving way; all the time you walk in you see the beauty which is given back to you.
3. Be true to who you are! As long as you are honest to yourself almost everything comes to you effortless, even attention. This is because you follow your soul path, your passions. The tricky part is to know who you truly are, what you value, what you fear, and what you believe about yourself and others. There are many ways available to learn about yourself such as self-help books, guided meditation, intuitive consultants, life coaches, and many more.
4. Love yourself unconditionally! To love yourself is a great way to give loving attention to yourself. Once you have accepted yourself completely and love yourself without condition with all that you are, look like, sound, express, and feel you truly meet your inner need of attention.
5. Value your body! Your body is your house, so make sure you maintain it so it will be around for a long time. Once you care about the signals of your body as well as your food intake, fresh air, regular exercise, relaxation, emotional state and others you will feel energised as your body’s need for attention has been met.
6. Understand your feelings! Your feelings are messengers of your soul. Try to understand  instead of fighting them. Give your feelings attention as they are the best way to become aware of the strategies you are running. Maybe you got angry because a certain tactic you run unconsciously didn’t work out or maybe you feel bored because there is nobody entertaining you, nobody that pays you any attention. There are many other examples. Once you understand your tactics you are able to empower yourself in changing them.
7. Observe other people! Most of us are running tactics to meet the need of attention. Watch other people talking to each other and learn from them. What do you notice? Is there someone righteous, controlling, needy, or even demanding? The one behaviour that becomes most obvious to you could be a reflection of your own strategy. What advice would you give these people? How would you talk differently? Instead of giving this advice away, use it yourself and integrate it in your own communication styles.

This is only a glimpse of how we can effortlessly satisfy our need for attention and you may find your own unique way! But there is one thing certain and this is the longer we remain in the battles for attention the harder it is to truly meet our most important need, the one for attention!

by Sandy Seeber – January, 2012 More articles by Sandy Seeber

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